Reflections on Choices, Grace, and Calling
By Jim Holbrook
Our lives can be viewed as systems that interweave personal needs and desire, choices, chance, necessity, intention, imperfect knowledge, consequences, and grace. Our choices (which may be prompted by chance or necessity and which often are made in the face of imperfect knowledge) have consequences, some of which we intend and some of which we do not, some of which fulfill our personal needs and some of which do not. If the consequences of our choices are not what we intend or need, we can make different choices which produce different consequences. As we engage in life-long learning and as we strive in a spirit of humility to overcome our mistaken or outgrown choices, we contribute to how life works.
The Cosmos has given each of us unique gifts for us to develop to serve those who uniquely need our gifts. If we open ourselves to the operation of grace in our lives, we can be inspired to value our gifts, find our calling, embrace the courage to follow our passion, and offer what we can do to be in the service of others. Our gifts also include the trauma, losses, and grief we have experienced in our lives—these make us credible, accessible, and trustworthy to those who have experienced trauma, losses, and grief in their lives.
To find our calling is to find that thing in life that we are supposed to do: the thing the Cosmos needs us to do; the thing that only we can do; the thing that we must do to be fully alive, healthy, and productive. It is a struggle to find our calling because there are so many things we could do in our lives, and even do well (as measured by recognition, success, status, financial reward, etc.). Others will ask us to do some of those things and reward us for doing them. Our task, however, is to find that one thing among all others that we are called to do. That is our work. To do that work is our purpose and our destiny.
All growing up I was afraid to ask for things. I was afraid of hearing the word no. I missed out on a lot of opportunities as a consequence for my lack of trying. I have never been one who likes making ‘choices’. Maybe I just don’t like the uncertainty of not being in control of positive or negative consequences. It has only been in the past few years that I have started standing up for myself so to speak. It’s not that I am an easily manipulated person, because I’m really not. I’ve just had more life experiences and I have come to know what I want. I think of my current situation I am in now about my education direction. My parents want one thing, and I want the complete opposite. I cannot continue going my parents route simply because they think that will be best for me. I have to go my own way and do what makes me happy. Because ultimately, I am in control with how my life plays out and which roads I want to take. While there may be some hard consequences for me, ultimately my own happiness and following my passion is what is right for my life.
Interesting!
. Recognition, status, and financial reward are mentioned as some motivators to do certain things, but I think those motivations can lead us to misery if we aren’t careful. They may accompany our calling in life, but certainly won’t define it. It’s my belief that our personal calling will be something that makes us feel strong, needed, and productive. Our calling will be easy to identify when we reach it.
I really liked what Jim had to say, but I had so many questions that kept popping up in my head when I was reading. Perhaps that is what Jim wanted for his readers, to figure out what he meant for themselves. Some of these questions I had were; How do we know if we have found our calling? (maybe by asking this question it shows that I have not yet found mine) What happens if someone else thinks that my calling should be different than what I think or pursue? I think that identity goes along with the “calling” that we all have in life and that once we gain a deeper sense of knowledge of who we are and what we are here to do, we will be able to answer our own questions and hopefully be the answer to someone elses questions or prayers.
Very interesting read. I liked the part about how making different choices produces different consequences, which I believe to be very true. We need to make sure that we know of the consequences that are attached to our actions. If we do so we’ll be able to make better and smarter choices.
I know from personal experience that the ends don’t always justify the means. I am afraid that all to often we in our society focus on only the things that bring us status and financial rewards, when if we invested more in ourselves and searching for what will truly bring us fulfillment and enrich our lives, we would be so much happier. I feel that if we did that fear would not rule our lives and the important journey in our lives would be a much more fulfilling spiritually which translates to us being able to give more of our selves to the ones we truly care about.
Even though I’m only 17 and still am in high school, I’ve always mentally been 5 steps ahead. I want to be older and in college, and on my way to have my life almost figured out. So I’m glad that I read this to know that my most important journey in this life is to find out my purpose and my destiny, that way I can use that for the good.
I love the saying “some people learn from their mistakes, but better people learn from others mistakes.” I feel the consequences we face after our actions place a vital role in our lives. I thought this was great advice and very motivating to make the right choice, to have the right consequence.
Finding our calling in life is hard! I agree that each individual do have gifts that allow us to be more attentive, or even skilled with development and figuring out those things that can be more productive for others who uniquely need our gifts. Investing in more time to others’ benefit can help them figure out what they need to do.