Deception: How often do you tell a lie?
How often do people lie in their daily lives?
Serota, Levine, Boster (2010) conducted an online survey of 1,000 Americans. Participants were given the following description of what might constitute lying:
“We are interested in truth and lies in people’s everyday communication. Most people think a lie occurs any time you intentionally try to mislead someone. Some lies are big while others are small; some are completely false statements and others are truths with a few essential details made up or left out. Some lies are obvious, and some are very subtle. Some lies are told for a good reason. Some lies are selfish; other lies protect others. We are interested in all these different types of lies. To help us understand lying, we are asking many people to tell us how often they lie.”
Participants were asked how many lies they had told in the past twenty-four hours. Here are some of the key findings:
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(1) The average number of lies told per day was 1.65.
(2) 40.1% of the sample reported telling a lie in the past 24 hours.
(3) 22.7% of all lies were told by one percent of the sample, and half of all of the lies were told by 5.3% of the sample.
(4) Subsequent to controlling for various demographic variables, no statistically significant sex differences were found in terms of the extent of lying (men = 1.93 lies; women = 1.39 lies).
Interestingly, prior to 1996 the bulk of deception research had focused on the behavior of the sender’s communication. This changed as Buller and Burgoon (1996) argued that given the myriad of factors that influence communication, the sender’s conduct and messages are affected by the interaction of the receiver. They also explained that intentional deception requires significantly more cognitive resources than truthful communication. As a result of the extra information management on the part of the deceiver, deception interaction can be more stressful and “leakage” can occur. Leakage is non-strategic behavior, either verbal or non-verbal that range from verbal mis-cues to unexpected physiological conduct (Buller and Burgoon, 1996, Interpersonal Deception Theory).
There are five interesting findings of Interpersonal Deception Theory that are applicable to communication.
1. Verbal Cues of Deception:
a. Incompleteness: Statements that are informationally incomplete and/or conversationally incomplete.
b. “Verdicality”: Statements that are trying to give the appearance of plausibility or truthfulness.
c. Indirectness/Irrelevance: Deceivers may offer statements that are partially relevant but substantively incomplete.
d. Lack of Clarity: The use of language that is vague, ambiguous, equivocal.
e. Depersonalization/ Distancing from the message: This is usually achieved by a shifting of the topic, changing of the subject, as well as attributing the statement to a third party.
2. Physiological Cues of Deception:
Certain non-verbal cues have been associated with deception including: pressed lips; limited use of gestures; chin raising; appearance of nervousness; change in vocal pitch (higher); and pupil dilation. Other cues include: rigid appearance, speech fillers (e.g. um, ah), gaze aversion, and slower and more deliberate speech rate.
3. Truth Bias:
In communication there is an implied “social contract,” which includes a tacit understanding that we will be honest with each other. This social norm is very powerful, and it is difficult for receivers to overcome. Often we enter into an interaction believing we can believe/trust the other person, this makes it difficult for us to detect deception.
4. Reciprocity:
It is axiomatic that the ultimate success of attempted deception is whether or not the receiver of the communication perceives it to be truthful.
5. Engagement/Interactivity:
Senders are in a better position to deceive as communication unfolds interactively (rather than a monologue form). The greater the quality and interaction between the sender and the receiver, the greater the probability for successful deception.
I listened to a fascinating podcast produced by radio lab about lying:
http://www.radiolab.org/story/91612-deception/
The first segment is about catching liars, using micro expression detection.
The second segment documents the life of a pathological liar.
The final segment is about lying to ourselves and the “confusing and contradictory” idea of self-deception. I learned a lot about deception and the pathology of liars from this podcast.
Finally, as for picture books about deception, I like the story “Empty Pot” by Demi.
Synopsis: When Ping admits that he is the only child in China unable to grow a flower from the seeds distributed by the Emperor, he is rewarded for his honesty.
This book is one of my favorites. It is great for teaching children about deception and the rewards that come from honesty and integrity!
This is very interesting. Deception or “lying” is a tool (whether good or bad is still a debate, but generally depends on the situation). In my view, being a liar (untrustworthy) is not a good thing. It destroys relationships and lives. However, there may be (depending on one’s opinion) times where it is okay to lie, when is also in debate.
I have always found the art of deception fascinating. Especially since watching the TV show “Lie to Me” (even if the story lines and situations are exaggerated). I think that being able to tell a lie that is believable is a kind of art (even though lying is perceived as being a negative thing to do). There are so many psychological factors that come into play when we ourselves practice to deceive. Often times the lies we tell ourselves can be motivating. Other times it can be self-destructive and lead us into a downward spiral.
The study of micro expression in deceiving has to be the most fascinating science that I know of. Being able to tell if someone is lying solely based on your observations of their body language is amazing. Having known several pathological liars in my life, I can see know how they were affected every time they communicated with others.
I personally do not see the benefit of lying to others as it can and will eventually take away trust, and I value a persons trust above most things.
I thought this article was interesting, particularly the part about self-deception. I think sometimes some of us get caught up in this, maybe to justify certain things and to help ourselves feel better. And i think maybe this could be the root of lies told to others. That when you aren’t honest with someone, maybe it could be because it’s stemming from self-deception. It’s interesting to think about.
I find it intriguing that you can tell if a person is lying just by observing their gestures and behavior. Obviously perspective plays a major role in deciding what certain behaviors imply. I thought what was written above was well thought out and had factual backing. It makes sense that people who are trying to decieve you would display a certain look or act a certain way.
Sure we can detect more often than not the lies of those we are very familiar with more often than not, but I feel that these cues are not always accurate. Just as an example people in my family have been very good at keeping things from one another. There is too much room for misinterpretation to be 100% accurate all of the time when trying to detect lies.
I’m telling a lie right now so that I can quit my job for the summer, but also have it to come back to in the fall! I should probably feel worse about that than I actually do.
I don’t know if it is wise to go around trying to detect lies. Common and courteous lies are important, and detecting them is more trouble than it’s worth. I believe the social norm is that we all lie to each other a little bit, and saying that the social norm is that we’re all honest, is just another one of those lies.
Lying is such an interesting topic because everybody does it in some way or another. It would be crazy hard not to. I like to think of myself as an honest guy but I catch myself lying all the time to spare peoples feelings or to keep myself from getting in trouble at work. They are never big lies and maybe I should feel bad about them, but I don’t. Everybody does it and I think that everyone accepts that. Its just the way we are. I think most of us would rather not know when we are being lied to most the time because our feelings would be hurt if we did.
Deception is so prevalent in today’s society. In reading this article the Lack of Clarity within verbal cues of deception stood out to me. A lack of clarity is a main way people deceive. For example if I take a girl out on a couple of dates and we are talking regularly but one night I decide to take out another girl I’ll simply say to the first girl I cant do anything tonight I am going to a movie with some friends. If in fact I was going to a movie as a group date I perfectly could justify this as telling the truth but when in reality my lack of clarity led to deceiving the girl in hopes that she won’t think I’m taking another girl out. Now would I ever do this.. of course not haha but I feel that is an example of frequent deception due to a lack of clarity in the form of a vague statement of what you will be doing.
I feel like another verbal cue of deception would be misleading answers such as when we see politicians on the news and they give an answer to a question that really doesn’t give any worthwhile information. I believe there is actually a name for answers like this and it’s something along the lines of an ‘artful dodge’.
Lying is almost always seen as negative, but it can actually be beneficial and helpful and maybe even kind to lie to another. It would be very difficult to go through a whole day without lying. You would end up hurting someone else’s feelings or even get in trouble (or fired) at your workplace. Even though it’s seen as such a negative thing I believe that lying is common and even necessary in our daily lives.
I actually had no idea that that many lies are told everyday. It’s actually kind of sad, but at the same time it is human nature to fabricate things or fib/lie about things whether it be to save face, save someone from getting their feelings hurt, or simply to make something sound more interesting than reality.
I feel that the facial cues and all of that are not always accurate. I think maybe if I were trained specifically for that then it would be different. Sure it would totally be easier for someone to catch a lie with someone that they are already familiar with. I always thought lying and deceiving were the same thing! ha I was wrong. I have learned that lying isn’t always a bad thing either. Sometimes it is better for both parties involved.
I had no idea that people lied so frequently but after thinking for a while I realized I probably do it to. Do white lies count? Of course they do but thats one of my big ones. I guess people find it easy to justify them if its for a good reason and at a certain point you dont even have to justify it to not feel bad. It makes you wonder if everyone on has the same idea as to what telling a white lie is and how far that probably gets stretched. I read the same book as a kid I couldn’t remember how I had heard that story until I was talking to a sibling of mine and realized we owned it. Im glad you put it in there, the concept of the story stuck with me for a long time.
After doing the deception project in your class I was amazed at the things I did not know about deception. This article reminded me that trying to catch someone in a lie is harder than we think. Depending on our knowledge and what we know about deception we still only have about 55% chance at catching someone in a lie even when we know the cues and voice pitch. With every person there is always going to be different cues, if it is someone we know really well or if it is someone that lived in a different culture. Why reading on the subject even the cues, hand gesture, body language, eye movements are not always correct, there really is no perfect method of detecting lie.
I really liked this blog and this subject interests me a lot. Its interesting how often we lie and why we do it. Are white lies really ok? I tend to think that they are not. This quote says a lot to me about white lies and lies in general.
“By lying, we deny others a view of the world as it is. Our dishonesty not only influences the choices they make, it often determines the choices they can make—and in ways we cannot always predict. Every lie is a direct assault upon the autonomy of those we lie to.”
― Sam Harris, Lying
I am horrible at detecting lies. I am always so trusting that I almost always just assume that people are telling the truth. People call me naive because of this, and they are absolutely right. It is good to know that there is some level of consistency to how people lie, because maybe I can use the outline here to figure out lies more often, though sometimes I enjoy my rather ignorant stance of just assume people are being honest.
I had never thought about how deceptive we can be until this article. A lie here, white lie there and then half truths up the wazoo is scary how constant it is. But i never thought about the half truths being deceptive but they are. We like to just say what people want to hear which is pleasing but still considered being deceiving. It is an interesting thought.
This is very interesting, but I have a problem with the Cues that detection of lying can bring. These cues are not always accurate. Everyone shows lying in different ways and there is just too much room for error when trying to figure out the deception or deceiving of others. A question comes up, is lying wise or foolish? I feel that if we asked a room full of people this question, we would get a very mixed answer. This scares me about todays society because why is it so important for others to destroy the perception that we have of ourselves and others by lying? Not knowing the truth ourselves about lying shows that honesty to yourself and the world is most important, especially in the way that upcoming generations are heading.
I wouldn’t say I am a constant liar but I am one of those people who will sometimes say something then catch myself after I said it and think “Why did I even say that?” I am not really sure what triggers me to say things but often times when I catch myself telling a lie, I’ll stop and think now why did I even say that? What was the point of lying especially when I didn’t need to? Lying to me is something that just isn’t worth it. If you have to lie you are just digging yourself deeper. Even though I am so against lying for just about any reason, I catch myself lying for the dumbest reasons and I am not even sure what caused me to lie to begin with.
What shocked me most about the initial statistics is the idea that at one point or another, we all lie. I myself am guilty of this at times, but it worries me greatly to think that everyone lies. How is it we can trust each other if we all lie to each other? Believing everyone could simply tell the truth is unrealistic. However, I believe that everyone could benefit by reading this literature. If we all tried to understand our motivations behind our lies, maybe we would simply do it less.
I found the statistics very interesting. I don’t often think about how often everyone lies but this article got me thinking about how often I lie and how often others lie. I never have the intent of lying but sometimes it is an easier way of getting out of something. I think we all probably class ourselves as being honest people but if we really looked at it we all tell some lie at some point in our lives. Now I am wondering how often someone tells me a lie to spare feelings or just because they need to get out of something!
I know we went over a little bit of this in class, but one of the experiments from the podcast really stuck out to me. There was an experiment where an individual listened to a series of voices and had to pick out their own voice. Most people could not successfully recognize their own voice. However, the participants vitals were being monitored and the body had a reaction to the sound of his/her own voice. I think that is absolutely incredible that the body recognizes itself, even if the mind doesn’t quite catch it. The body recognized and reacted. If the human body detects it’s own voice, I’m sure it can detect inconsistencies conveyed to us. It just goes to show, that gut instincts aren’t just hunches but physiological responses.
I think it is interesting that we still debate whether lying is acceptable. I have known people who look at lying with at very Kantian view: You can’t lie about anything unless you are okay with people lying about everything all the time. I don’t like dishonesty and I don’t think of myself as a liar but at the same time I know that I do deceive people intentionally for my own selfish reasons. Maybe it is something for me to look at. Could I life a life with out lying? I don’t know.
Although I do consider myself an honest person, this really made me think about the lies I do tell. It is still a lie even if it is just to spare someones feelings or an easier way to get out of something. I’ll have to work on not telling those little white lies! Even if it is to spare someones feelings, I wouldn’t want someone else to lie to me just to spare my feelings and I doubt they would want that either.
I feel like most of the time, deception isn’t lying. Very few people straight-up lie, but instead manipulate the truth. I know that, in the unfortunate and terrible times that I have deceived people, I often use the excuse “I can’t remember”. This is code for “I don’t want to remember, so I’m making myself believe that I’ve forgotten”. I guess the important question is this: how much are we manipulating truth, or how complete are the truths we say?
I find it very interesting how lying plays its role in society. I personally think that it’s important for people to always be honest no matter what the consequence. It’s better for people to know the truth then to find out that their friend lied behind their back to protect them. For me it seems that they get in the same situation. I liked how it talked about if the receiver perceived it to truthful. You can’t really work with someone who thinks nothing is true.
I found this interesting. It is a tool we all use for many reasons. I feel that if the deception is going to hurt you or others it shouldn’t be done. But if it is for the grater good some times deception can be useful.
Lying and deception are interesting concepts. To me honesty in everything is huge. I would rather have the cold hard truth than a lie any day, however I realize not everyone is like that. For this reason deception is used to protect a relationship, however what is the bigger burden, lying and keeping it in, or telling the truth? I liked in the podcast how it talked about our micro expressions. Deceiving someone is a lot more work than telling the truth. Our micro expressions change while lying and these are not the only changes occurring.
Deception is such a hard aspect of life to pinpoint. Every thing is grey and can be justified by any variation of means. The podcast was very interesting to me, the ability to just lie without premise or guilt is baffling. Everyone deceived with out even realizing it, but blatant lies are not only taxing on the individual being deceived, but also the deceiver.
Deception and lying is a topic that applies to everyone whether we like it or not. Even those who think they are the most honest people sometimes will do something that is deceitful. Sometimes we lie because it gets us out of an uncomfortable talk or situation or other times it may be because we think it will be better if the other doesn’t know. Either way, with-holding this information on purpose does imply that you are deceiving them. As mentioned in above comments, it is a tool. Some use it for the benefit of themselves and some use it for the benefit of others. It does have differing results though so the end result does vary depending on the situation of why the lie was told.
Lying and deception have always been so intriguing to me. I always think that lying or deceiving individuals must be so exhausting and hard to keep track of all the lies that are said. To me, telling the truth makes things so much easier at the end of the day. Additionally, I would rather have someone hear something from me personally then from someone else.
Interesting! I have brothers I have seen it all. And unfortunately they have seen it all to;) Deception is not just telling lies, but also not saying anything, or not saying truth!
When I think of lying I think of white lies. Now I don’t think that everyone gives a real lie all of the time. There are a lot of people who tell white lies or the smaller lies to give more of a kick on stories or to protect people from being hurt or getting in fights. I see this a lot in my life where someone talks behind others back and if they ask you if said person was talking behind their back you’re usually going to say no to not get in the middle of it or spark conflict.
Personally I feel like most people that lie life for a reason. If someone lies just to lie I feel as though that person is a pathological liar. It’s very interesting to think about how many times you lie per day. even if you consider it a white lie. Whether or not we do it to protect someone’s feelings I feel as though almost everyone should try to lie less.